My weekly weigh-in revealed a five ounce loss; THREE POUNDS TO GO until I reach my goal of 70 pounds gone!
The most pressing weekly nugget God laid on my heart is, BE MORE CONCERNED WITH BEING HUMBLE THAN BEING RIGHT.
This message God laid on my heart months ago and it pertained to my relationship with my cute, fire stomping hubby. That fire’s out but God revealed a new fire that required fire fighter services. It was the fire in my heart due to anger and unforgiveness.
What does unforgiveness have to do with my weight loss journey? Everything!
I am being set free from being an emotional eater and people pleasing. I was a “stuffer”. The more I stuffed, the hotter and angrier my heart became and the more physical weight I carried. I took the Christian message of, “turn the other cheek” (Luke 6:29) to a sinful extreme. I turned the other cheek, in false humility, and used it as an excuse to hide the real me. I felt alone and burned with anger. My fire fighter husband continues to educate me on fire safety with remarks like, “That candles too close to…(the curtain, the shelf, the combustible can of…). I know if I am physically on fire, I should stop, drop and roll. Since my heart was on fire, I had to stop (tantrums), drop to my knees to hear God speak (in prayer) and then roll (take action).
God continues to teach me what a balanced “turn the other cheek type of forgiveness” means. I am feeling freer and lighter!
… set free from the stifling atmosphere of pleasing others and fitting into the little patterns that they dictate. Can’t you see the central issue in all this? It is not what you and I do—It is what God is doing, and he is creating something totally new, a free life! Galatians 6:14-16 (MSG – Paraphrased)
God has to do something new, because the old way just didn’t work. I used to wonder, “Why did I just spout off in anger like that?” and usually at the most unsuspecting times?
The people I get the most worked up about (okay…spastic – like one of those yipper dogs that endlessly yip while staring you down, completely unaware of their puny size) are the people I have not forgiven.
One night last week, I spewed fire out. Dave donned his invisible firefighting gear and courageously listened.
He offered these wise words (which initially ticked me off even more!), “Honey, are you going to be able to forgive this person on your own, or do you need to go to them and ask them for an apology?” Instantaneously, this yipper got a stompin’ on and my pathetic puny-ness was revealed. God gave me three specific examples of people I had chosen not to forgive. There is more than one way to forgive and put a fire out. Similarly, there is more than one way to forgive. When there’s a fire, what should I do?
STOP, DROP and ROLL.
STOP – The first person is completely clueless of her offense. Expectation management says, “Give her a break, she’s a baby Christian. Babies only think about themselves. When they grow up, that’s when they’ll realize there are others out there to think about!” Turn the other cheek, forgive and press on. God’s message, “STOP it Steph.”
DROP – The second person asked me for forgiveness. I said yes, but my actions are speaking, “You are gonna pay for this one for some time.” Love… keeps no record of wrongs. 1 Corinthians 13:4-5 (NIV) God’s message, “DROP it Steph.”
ROLL – The third person, I went to and confronted (girl, were my palms and pits ever dripping the sweat down!). I apologized first because God told me, BE MORE CONCERNED WITH BEING HUMBLE THAN BEING RIGHT. The person blew it off as “no big deal” (well, to them, it wasn’t!). And God had me do expectation management there. That’s just not someone I can go deeper with. And that is a real blessing because there’s no confusion of expectations anymore! God’s message, “ROLL with it Steph.”
Literally, my brain goes into “fire checklist mode” because I want to develop this new habit of quick forgiveness so well, that it become like breathing. I’m so not there yet! The “Lord’s Prayer” does ignite the persuasive proof to why I need keep my fire extinguisher close by,
Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. Matthew 6:12 (NIV)
The measure I forgive will be proportionately returned to me. Clearly, I have my work cut out. I sure like the feeling of being forgiven, particularly when it’s never brought back up again (ouch!)!
I want to be a powerful, spiritually “on-fire” Christian…not a Christian that spews fire and burns people down. If I stuff the water words down, no fire gets put out. If I blow them out of my mouth like a fire breathing dragon, damage will occur. I need balance. I desperately need God to teach me balance much like we’ve taught our sons how to balance and walk. There were many falls to the ground that were followed by many willful choices to get back up again.
After I stop, drop and roll, I need to make the willful choice to get back up again.
Is there the fire of anger and unforgiveness in your heart? Will you choose to turn to God for strength to stop, drop and roll, and then make the willful choice to get back up again?
