ENCOURAGED IN HEART

Lucy’s back and ready to be walked all over, and so I did! My weekly weigh-in revealed a two ounce gain.  To that I say, WHATEVER…I’ll just grab my razor and shave my arm pits and legs and call it even! Was that last sentence in violation of the TMI (Too Much Information) rule?

As a recovering emotional eater, some days my pursuit of physical, emotional and spiritual health is most similar to that of a tight rope walker.

I need to walk the fine line with a deliberate attention to detail.  If not, one snarf session can invite an old habit back, and fast.  I celebrate that, one afternoon this week, I felt a particularly intense urge to get my “snack on”. Sometimes, there’s no need to know why the urge is there, I just need not act on it. I chose an apple and experienced the exhilaration of the altitude!

But, another afternoon, I got my “snack on” and made the choice to not stop, breath and pray.  I grabbed the partially eaten Milk Dud box (which I vowed I’d not keep in my house) and chewed my jaws tired. And down from my rope I fell…

And that’s exactly when God dropped my nugget.

If I’m going to walk the tight rope, I need a safety net to fall into.

A tight rope walker doesn’t just walk on a rope and hope she doesn’t fall.  No, she knows it’s not a matter of if, but a matter of when. A true professional is prepared.

The same theory applies in my eating addiction recovery.  I need to plan for a fall, because life and eating are not about walking a perfect fine line.  I’m learning how to master this and the more I practice, the less I’m falling!

Six years ago, when I began this earnest quest for weight loss, I did so alone.  I wanted to see how far God and I and would go together.  God then revealed it was time for me to step out in faith and facilitate a women’s small group, to bring others along on the journey and by doing so, be supported too.  We started as ten gals, but between a cross country and local moves, refocus in ministry, challenges of homeschooling and work, we are now five.

These gals pictured (and yes, I got permission to plant their pretty faces up here!) are so precious to me.  They’re real women, with real lives that really desire to have God planted deeply in their lives. Look how beautiful they are:

(Left to right): Linda, Kimberly, Jenny, me and Jen

You use steel to sharpen steel, and one friend sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17 (Message)

I so get this verse as these women have helped make me stronger.  Here is one example of how each woman has sharpened me.  And this was really difficult to narrow down to just one.  Drum roll please…

Linda – Everyday life is worthy of a special necklace! (Even when your hubby’s deployed and carting three precious children to and from…)
Kimberly – The value of honesty and humor!
Jenny – I am precious to God.  I am His princess!
Jen – Don’t put people “in a box” and to color outside the lines!

If I didn’t follow God, I would have missed out on a lot more than just this.  I can’t do life alone, who will hold my net when I fall?

This week at group, I shared about my fall (and a bunch more…) and felt, well, caught.

I feel as though they got me and get me; that safety net is a precious life saver!

Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. Hebrews 10:25 (New International Version)

So, how’s your safety net looking? Do you need to get one or praise God for the one you have?

My weekly weigh-in revealed that I’m just fabulous! Well, it felt fabulous just typing it! I have nothing to report as Lucy remains across the street at her sleep over party. I wonder if she’s gained weight?

My weekly nugget was delivered from an adorable, freckle nosed little boy with the most adorable cowlick, or perhaps more accurately, cal-lick, our son, Cal.

This past week, I inquired, “How’d you get so smart?” His prompt reply, “cause, cause, cause…I listen to God.” Nice one Mr. Smartie-Pants!

WOWZERS, ZOINKERS and SHAZAM … our kid is smart (and faithful!)!

Out of the mouths of babes and unweaned infants You have made (provided) perfect praise? Matthew 21:16b (AMP)

Cause I listen to God. I’ve been gnawing on this one all week. I’m impressed and challenged with the ease and truth Cal provided.  My self-talk exploded, “I listen to God…well, usually!”

My private time modus operandi(M.O)is park my butt in our comfy overstuffed chair, with both water and coffee and get to it.  In other words, I stop, drop and do.

Next to my comfy chair, I have a basketful of goodies to help me “do”.  I pulled out a bunch of them…three Bible translations, a concordance, a devotional, and journal (with green pen…are you impressed with my non-black-ink-ness Jen W.?)…

“Do-ing” comes naturally to me.  “Be-ing” (listening) does not. God crafted me as a Type A, “git-r-done” kinda gal so I need to learn how to live against my natural bent.

God gently provided, “Listen already!” (Just so you know, this is not a new nudge, He’s just used our youngest to deliver the message, most likely with the thought, “she’s got to get it if I use her 3 year old!”)

So, today, I did journal, I did read, and then I looked at my watch and said, Lord, I’m going be silent.  The entire two minutes and 35 seconds (hey, Rome wasn’t built in one day!) comforted, refreshed and pointed.

God pointed that my Monday evening carb-loading (that’s a gentle way to put it) was because I’m grieving Romeo.  I miss Romeo’s comfort, particularly when Dave’s overnight at the firehouse.  Monday nights acted as a date night for Romeo and I; we bonded even more. I cherished the “us time” once the boys were in bed.  Romeo never complained about his decreased position on the totem pole when the boys arrived on scene.  Like always, he just took it all in stride.

Romeo’s void is everywhere. I still look down on the floor as I get out of bed to not trip over him.  He’s still on my lips as we come in and out of the house with my reflex statement, “close the door boys, Romeo’s gonna get out”.  My floors and vacuum canister lack the tumbleweeds of dog fur.  I found myself even looking for a few stray fur hairs on the steps as I vacuumed.  Even in my windproof jacket yesterday, were plastic poop bags that waited to be filled.

Sunday, we had a ceremony for Romeo.  The boys agreed the rock they dug out of the earth earlier that day was to be his memorial stone, it seemed a natural fit. We personalized the stone:

Cal doodled on the top and side,

Jake painted a smile,

I wrote his name,

and Dave painted a heart.

Dave dug a hole, where we placed a bag filled with personal remembrances, Cal placed Romeo’s fur, Jake drew a picture, I wrote a letter and Dave placed a picture.  We said a family prayer and covered the hole.  It felt good knowing, it’s okay to grieve.
Two years ago, when Juliet died, we did nothing to release the pressure of grief. Sure we cried, but just denied the promptings of grief and pressed on.  Dave and I both agreed that we feel a compounded grief now. God speaks and says it’s okay to grieve my child, don’t stuff it. I’m here and care.  That’s what He spoke, and I deeply desire now to listen.

Do you listen in on God’s council? Do you limit wisdom to yourself? Job 15:8(NIV)

Stop, drop and listen…then do. This is my new M.O. I need to listen to God. If I don’t I’m limited in wisdom, for sure!

Take it from Mr. Smartie Pants, this guy’s got it going on!

Be smart and listen to God!

How’s your hearing these days?

PS
Check out the new movie Fireproof, I saw it this week with hubby and it was AWESOME! You can find out where it’s playing: http://www.fireproofthemovie.com/