This past Friday brought some new challenges for the Fink family and a new opportunity to experience a really big God. Jake came off his kindergarten bus deflated and defeated. Once home, I inquired, “What’s up?” Jake told me his “friend” closed-fist punched him, “like ten times”. You see, this is not normal behavior for this friend as Jake has said only nice things about him.
I quickly transformed into investigator mode, “What did you do babe? Did you tell him to stop, move seats, hit him back?” Our conversation revealed, he told his friend to stop many times, did not punch back, and was afraid to move from his assigned seat for fear he’d be yelled at by the bus driver. So he remained. I feared the answer to my next question, “How did that make you feel?”
“Scared.”
As I observed the numerous red marks on his milky-white core, I cried out to the Lord, “Father, why? Help!”
Confused and hurt Jake asked, “Why would my friend hit me?” As I embraced him tightly I said, “Honey, real friends don’t punch. Let me pray right now.” Jake balled his sweet little eyes out and my heart shattered to pieces as I was not able to protect him, there on that bus.
After things settled down, I called the boy’s mother. I asked that after she talked with her son, if Jake could speak with her son. She called back and courageously Jake said, “Why did you punch me? You made me feel sad.” The boy replied, “I didn’t hit you.” The boy’s parents called three more times over the weekend, to tell me their son didn’t budge, “I didn’t hit Jake.”
“Why would my friend lie?” Embracing his little body, I whispered, “Honey, real friends don’t punch and real friends don’t lie. He is not a real friend. Sweetheart, if he admitted and apologized, then he would be a real friend.” Jake balled hysterically.
Saturday morning devotion theme was to P-U-S-H.
P -ray
U-ntil
S-omething
H-appens
I asked our sons who they wanted to “p-u-s-h” for. Jake said this little boy, “that God would make him my friend.” I put on a poker face, knowing Jake was right, but I won’t lie, I wanted this little boy to pay for what he did to my son.
“What an awesome idea Jake. Let’s pray right now.” So we lifted our heavy hearts and prayers to the Most Real Friend I’ve ever known, Jesus.
I erased the old scripture on the boys’ bathroom mirror and wrote,
P -ray
U-ntil
S-omething
H-appens
My Sunday private time petitions included, “Lord, help Jake, guard his heart. You know how sensitive he is. Please Lord, don’t let him roll over on this, help him fight!” The Lord told me, “Jake is fighting, with the energies of prayer. Trust me, I am here.” He guided me to focus on looking up forgiveness scriptures. Sounded like great guidance to me as I know I needed instruction. The Holy Spirit guided me to Matthew Chapter 5 and to share this with the boys for devotion. Gulp. But I’m not doing this right now Lord. “Do it anyway, Steph. Confess it first and then you’ll do it.”
At breakfast I told the boys the only way we’ll know how to act is to keep praying and reading the Bible. Listen to what God told me this morning.
“If someone strikes you, don’ t hit back. Love your friend and love your enemies. When someone gives you a hard time, respond with the energies of prayer.” (excerpts from Matthew 5:32-48 Message)
I told Jake, “That’s what God told us to do – respond with prayer - and you did it! You are a great friend to God and this boy. Mom and Dad are so proud of you, and most importantly God IS proud of you son!”
AGAIN, Jake decided to pray for this boy, to make a “thumbs up choice” and tell the truth. Again, he p-u-s-h-ed. He said, “I forgive him.” Overwhelmed by this lesson of forgiveness, I affirmed, “Jake, I’m so proud of you for choosing to forgive him with out him telling the truth or asking for it. I know you are feeling sad and you are making the right choice. Forgiving him doesn’t mean you need to play with him, it just means you forgive him.”
I contacted the teacher and school administration to resolve this. The boy’s father went in Monday morning. (I am grateful God gave us receptive and compassionate parents that followed through, despite their son’s behavior.) The school counselor called me first. In her office she said the boy did finally admit to punching Jake and offered an apology. Jake said, “I forgive you.”
I met with Jake’s teacher and an administrator (who had a cross and The Shack on his desk) to talk things through. I told Jake punching is not okay and the adults in your school need to know so they can help you. (Honestly, I want Jake to know it is serious when bodily harm occurs and that as Christians we’re not to roll over and play dead, but we’re all not to stuff this stuff either.) The counselor, administrator, and Jake’s teacher were responsive, compassionate and protective of Jake.
At bedtime, as Jake and I snuggled in for bedtime prayers Jake offered, “God, thank you for answering my prayers.” I said a hearty, “AMEN.”
Navigating through life’s turns and curves is difficult. Impossible if it wasn’t for My Friend God to direct our steps. I know I need to keep turning control and to trust Him continually and repetitively. I had to re-surrender control back to Him many times this weekend. God showed up big time for my son and me this weekend.
So it is with misty eyes that I thank both God and Jake, for showing me what forgiveness and earnest prayer do…show God’s awesome power. It is HE who is the Best Friend anyone can have. God used our six year old to show this 35 year old what “real friends, real prayer and a REAL-LY Big God are.” POWERFUL.
I pray you experience our REAL-LY Big God today too! 
While you are organizing, get your financial papers organized as well. Are you currently beating your head against the wall while doing your taxes, because you can’t find that “all important” receipt that you KNOW you kept? 
