ENCOURAGED IN HEART

(If you are visiting from the P31 Woman magazine, thank you for stopping by! )

Two years.  Yes, two years of rejection letters before I received my very first “yes”.  “More Examined In The Waiting Room” is my very first published piece.  I’m humbled and delighted that though the rest of the authors in P31 Woman magazine are “known” authors, I am an “unknown”.

I want to thank the entire Proverbs 31 Ministry staff, especially Lysa TerKeurst and Glynnis Whitwer who have gone before, encouraged and paved the way for me and countless women to pursue their passion! Thank you for this opportunity! (Opportunity sure has been the the word of the week here!) I also want to thank my writer’s group, Scribe’s Alley, particularly Jen (THANK YOU for never quitting, that choice helped change my life!), Mike and Al for critiquing and pursuing this call together!

(I celebrated today with an iced coffee from McD’s!)

I’m delighted to say that I’m finally “published”!   But what delights me even more is that I experience God more intimately when I wait…more than when I “get”.   And, not just in that doctor’s office waiting room that I mentioned in my article , but everywhere!

I’m learning to not just white-knuckle-wait, but to worship God while I wait.  Worshiping God is much more fun and I’m near positive that it burns more calories than the worrying/fretting approach.

What does worshiping God while I wait look like?

Well, it depends on the situation…

Waiting for our second son to be born, I memorized a scripture and spoke Hebrews 11:1 every time fear rose up in me.  I said that verse A LOT. Waiting in a pre-op surgical room, it meant that I listened to a surgical nurse tearfully speak of her ill and deteriorating father, instead of focusing on me…me…me.  Waiting for a financial miracle meant that Dave and I gave above our tithe when the pennies were diminishing each month.  Seven years later, that additional $100 seed of monthly “worship” translated to currently a 100% increased income today.  Waiting for loved ones to come into a relationship with Christ has meant that many times I talk less about Christ and pursue to act more like Him (loving).  When I’d really rather just shake them and lay out the, “Steph Fink Eight Point Plan of Salvation.” (As if…)  Waiting to be published required more than disappointment, but to rise up again to my keyboard, and type one more piece.  The refusal to quit is an act of worship.

God keeps telling me, as I tell our two young sons, “Patience child!” I won’t lie, I’m not a naturally gifted “wait-er”.  No, I’m a “git-r-done” (if this Jersey girl is permitted to borrow that expression from the southern folk) kind of gal.  But now that I see God is interested more in how I behave during the wait than after I have the final result, I want to sing a different song, a new song.

Instead of, “When God, when…?” or “Nobody knows…the trouble I’ve seen…” I want to sing a new song that is less like, “UGH!” and more like, “God, I don’t see you moving but I trust you!”

To celebrate this two year wait and this very special “published” moment, I would like to give you a “New Song” to encourage you in your wait.

The first 25 people to post a comment here will be sent a music CD!  You can post about something you are waiting on right now (I promise to pray for all posted), something you are celebrating after a long wait, or anything related to the waiting topic…you will receive a hot-off-the-presses-this-summer, CD appropriately titled, “Give me a new song”

Post a comment and I’ll contact you privately for your mailing address (and no, you won’t be put on any form of mailing list from me as that would require me to be far more organized than I currently am!)    As a special bonus, anyone who watched America’s Got Talent last summer and cheered on sweet top 10 contestant cutie, Kaitlyn Maher, she sings on the CD too!

(L-R: Our son Cal, Kaitlyn, our son Jake, friends “Bubba” and Madison!)

For those that I’m not able to give a freebie to, you can listen to song samples and purchase a copy here.

No matter where you are at in your wait game – entering, in the middle or received your answer – choose to worship God and wait well!

I waved Cal goodbye as my carpooling friend drove him off to morning preschool.  Eagerly, I  jumped on Fierce and peddled.  Biking is more than just a physical exercise time.  It’s a time that I experience communion with God.  I filled my lungs with the crisp chilled air and enjoyed the colorful canvass stroked with varied shades of crimson, tangerine, acorn and sage.

The more I peddled, the more cobwebs cleared from my brain and even more, from my heart.  It’s been a challenging week here at the Fink home.  With one of the boys home sick each day last week, my father’s unexpected two night hospital stay (thankfully all three are all much improved), and one final straw that nearly broke this camel’s back.

The straw that everything in me wants to keep it all to myself.

There’s a spot where I periodically love to go, just to hang with God.  In the middle of my ride, I pulled over.

(Beautiful, huh?)

I lingered and God spoke through song lyrics that played through my armband, “It’s not about me, it’s gotta be about You (God).” Yup, more tears. I just want to share my life with my three in-ies and that’s it.  But that’s not what God asked me to do this morning.

The “straw” that I mentioned above isn’t a straw, but rather a lump and I found it in my breast.

After two doctor appointments, one ultrasound, and consultation with my inner three, I’m headed to the surgeon’s office this Friday.  Which coincidentally is most likely the day I will celebrate seeing my name in print for the very first time as a ” published” author.

When I connected the two happenings to be on or near the same day, yeah…I felt sorry for myself.  Then I saw what was really happening.  The enemy trying to get me down and (after I cried) I made the choice to rise up.  I saw two options:   Will I choose to dance in the storm or hang alone in a pity party?

A couple we love and admire are going through an “opportunity” – their words, not mine.  I would have used: trial, struggle, dark season – they choose, “opportunity”.  Their powerful, faith-filled choice infected my choice today.  Which leads to the real reason I wanted to type this post.  For prayers – YES!  For a pity party – NO.  To encourage you to think of your current “trial” as an opportunity too? YES! YES! YES!

Whatever trial you face today, is it possible to think that it could be an opportunity?  An opportunity to experience God in a new, deeper and more intimate way?  What if there’s a medical care provider that needs to know of Jesus and by moaning, I miss that opportunity?

When Jesus corrected Peter old school style, in Matthew 16:23b (NLT), he said, “You are seeing things merely from a human point of view, not from God’s.” The approach to keep it all to myself is about “me” – the approach to step out and share my faith with others is about “Him”.

The distance from here to there is about You (Lord), not me.  Will you say “opportunity” instead of “trial”?

Deadliest Catch…

Have you heard of this show? Last year, Dave and I were hooked. It’s about ship crews that race to catch the most crab in the most horrid of weather and conditions, all in the name of earning an honest (and rather lucrative) living.  After Jake, Cal and my non-sea worthy performance on vacation this past summer, I give those guys props!

But as I saw our one son eat out of boredom last month, I realized what the deadliest catch truly is (outside of not knowing Jesus) – contagious addiction.

I know where he “caught” that idea from.  And, it wasn’t Dave…it was me.

I don’t want to disrespect my parents but rather honor them.  Part of this eating addiction recovery has been looking at my life and patterns with honest eyes.  Looking through honest lenses I see that I was taught emotional eating.  I was rewarded for being a member of the “clean plate club” and that taught me to overeat and not listen to my body.  I still continue to struggle with portion control. I’m not blaming them but I did learn it as a child and perfected it as a young woman.

As my mentor, Joyce Meyer, said many times that, “she’s drawing a line in the sand and letting it (addictive/destructive patterns) end” with her. (She had sexual, physical and emotional abuse in her family.)

Then I think about some of my family members, one is a recovering alcoholic and the other (who is in heaven with Jesus today) who battled drug addiction since his teen years.  When his son got arrested for marijuana possession, I thought a similar thought as when my precious son ate out of boredom…deadliest catch.

On the surface, food seems like the “lesser” offense (when compared to alcohol or drugs) because last time I checked, eating is not illegal!  But truly any substance (food, worry and shopping included) that takes the place of God, is a false idol and needs to be remedied ASAP.  Letting anything substitute for Christ is like that “authentic” Gucci watch I bought years ago from an Manhattan street “entrepreneur” – fake and eventually didn’t work.

Do you have a “deadliest catch” that needs God?  Will you allow God to work in you to end the cycle?  It’s not just your life that depends on it…your kids and circle of influence depend on you too.